The Bureaucratic Way
I refer to LBOs (Large Bureaucratic Organizations) often in this blog, because I find that in the 21st century they comprise the majority of orgs with which I interact. Online there is Microsoft and Google, when I want to buy something there is Amazon and OpenTable for making restaurant reservations. My long-time employer became an LBO during my worklife, governments from municipalities on up are LBOs and of course the health care system in Ontario is very much an LBO. I do my best to not interact with these orgs, I buy from Amazon only when I can not find what I need anywhere else, and I do most of my banking at a credit union, which I have sadly observed becoming larger and more bureaucratic in just the three years that I have been a ‘member’.
I think this predominance of LBOs in my life is bad, and that is because a primary feature of an LBO is that they do things bureaucratically. What does that mean? A very typical illustration of what it means came my way last week, so I share it here.
I remain on many email lists at my former employer, which results in my getting all kinds of emails from all sorts of official UWO sources. Last week I got one from a Dept Administrator, which was an instance of her forwarding to us an email from a bureaucrat, as she is, I’m sure, expected to do. Below is the email that she forwarded to everyone on her Dept list:
Western Special Constable Service is alerting you of a Public Safety Incident Natural Gas Leak at Perth Dr. (N. of UDR near North Campus Building). Either leave the area or stay away as required for your safety. Updates will be posted by Western Communications on official Western social media accounts as required. Initiators Initials: SD
Thank you,
Alert WesternU
Campus Safety & Emergency Services, Western University
What is the bureaucrat alerting us to? A Public Safety Incident Natural Gas Leak, of course. Is that different from, you know – a Natural Gas Leak? Well, to a bureaucrat, it kinda is. Note what comes first in that terminology – ‘Public Safety Incident’. That is a bureaucratic term, but it comes first, because the Bureaucratic Way is to tick the appropriate required box. You can be sure that there is a rule/procedure that requires that this bureaucrat issue a ‘Public Safety Incident Notice’ whenever something happens to affect ‘Public Safety’.
To a human being, what is important is that there is a ‘Natural Gas Leak’ near North Campus Building, but to the bureaucrat (initials SD) that is secondary to the requirement to Do the Correct Bureaucratic Thing – issue a Public Safety Incident Notice, because asses must be covered. As a bureaucrat, what matters is that you followed the appropriate procedure, should there be any ex-post questions about how said ‘incident’ was dealt with.
Now, the Dept Administrator who forwarded this bureaucratic email to all of us is – fortunately – a human being, so the very first thing she typed into her own email, above the official email from Alert WesternU, was
‘Fyi – Avoid North Campus Building Area’.
TG for human beings, eh?